“Your eating is a symptom.”
If you’ve practiced intuitive eating for a year, you know exactly what to do at the table, and your body still won’t go along with it. Tracy explains what may be happening beneath the surface.
Chrissy sits down with Tracy Brown, a trauma-informed nutrition therapist and eating disorder dietitian who also coaches stress recovery and has worked with people healing from disordered eating since 2006. They start with the red Walkman and the Sunday morning country countdown, then settle into the harder conversation about trauma and eating disorders. Tracy explains what trauma actually is, why you don’t need a war story to qualify, and how years of having your plate scrutinized can leave the same fingerprints as a car crash. She also walks through what your nervous system does when food feels like a threat, and she shares a recent Sunday when God showed her a blind spot, and she felt humble instead of ashamed.
Here's what we cover:
Why diet culture counts: hearing “you shouldn’t eat that” or “you shouldn’t be hungry for that” at every meal and every doctor’s visit adds up to hypervigilance
The definition Tracy borrows from Peter Levine: trauma lives in what happens inside us when no compassionate witness shows up
The two signs that something deeper is going on: intuitive eating that hasn’t stuck after six months to a year, and “whack-a-mole” recovery where every stressor sends you back
Fight, flight, freeze, and please, explained with a twig snapping in the woods, a tiger, and a dimmer switch, plus what each response can look like around food
Why trading thin for fit, or obsessive exercise for workaholism, leaves the same root in place
Where God is when terrible things happen, with Tracy’s comfort from Psalm 107:13-16 and her reminder to read all of Ephesians
A gentle first step you can take today (hand on your stomach), why James 4:7-10 works in order, and why healing only goes as fast as the slowest parts of you
How Chrissy and Tracy both quit praying for weight loss and started praying for the root, and what changed when they did
Friend, if you’ve done the work, read the books, and prayed the prayers, and your body still braces every time you sit down to eat, Tracy has a gentler explanation than “try harder.” She shows how years of criticism around your plate leave a mark on the nervous system, and why healing that mark takes safety and patience, not more willpower. Her own story of catching herself mid-rant on a Sunday, repenting out loud, and feeling humble instead of crushed shows what recovery looks like when you stop performing and start telling the truth. If you’re searching for Christian eating disorder recovery that takes your body, story, and your faith seriously, this conversation gives you a place to start. It also speaks to body image healing, healing your relationship with food, and the food freedom God created you for.
“Don’t wear that Band-Aid forever. It gets kind of gross.” - Tracy Brown
Looking for a Christian professional who understands eating disorders? Search the Christian Treatment Finder at CEDCN.org. You can also find Tracy there.
Which coping strategy has protected you the longest, and what would it feel like to hand it back to God? If you prayed for the root this week instead of the symptom, what would you say?
We’d love to hear your thoughts, so please drop us an email at admin@findingbalance.com, send us a voice message via SpeakPipe, or you can also subscribe for more practical episodes coming your way.
More About Tracy Brown
Tracy is a trauma-informed nutrition therapist, eating disorder dietitian, stress recovery coach, and nutrition counseling skills teacher. She walks beside people who want to heal their relationship with food and weight, and feel safer and less stressed in their bodies. Her testimony of recovery from eating disorders, trauma, and the new age is meant to bring glory to God’s mercy and grace.
Since 2006, she has guided people one-on-one and in groups in healing from disordered eating and chronic dieting, many of whom also have other stress-related conditions. Tracy also provides trauma-informed and body image training and supervision to health professionals.
Connect with Tracy Brown
Christian Treatment Finder Profile
Website and Embodied Dietitian
Mentioned Scriptures
Psalm 107:13-16, James 4:7-10, Ephesians
Mentioned Resource
Chrissy's Letterboard Lyric Source: "Who I Am" by Ben Fuller
FINDINGBALANCE:
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CHRIST-CENTERED RESOURCES TO HELP YOU FIND FREEDOM
The Daily Vitamin eDevo: A free devotional with bite-sized truth emailed 5 days a week
Community Groups: Find connection with prayer groups and our Hello, Freedom! community.
Christian Treatment Finder: Connecting you with Christian providers experienced in treating eating issues.
Lasting Freedom Online Course: A Christ-centered, non-diet course to work through false beliefs about food and weight so you can live free from disordered eating and body image issues.
CREDITS:
Intro music by “MokkaMusic” – Old Jeans (Funk)
Production & Editing by Marketing With Wisdom
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The content in this podcast is for informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, or prescribe a particular course of action. If you have, or suspect you may have, an eating disorder, please consult your healthcare provider. If you desire to receive faith-based care, visit ChristianTreatmentFinder.com to browse professionals with a Kingdom campaign against eating disorders.
The unedited transcript for this episode of Old School Food Freedom
Chrissy Kirkman [00:00:42]: We're so glad you're here with us today. Let's get into today's episode. Hey, Traci, welcome to the show.
Tracy Brown [00:00:53]: Oh, Krissy, thank you so much for having me. It's good to see you. See you again.
Meet Tracy Brown
Chrissy Kirkman [00:00:57]: Yeah, it's good to see you too. So before we get into all the good fun stuff, I'm going to tell our listeners a little bit about you. So this is Tracy Brown. Tracy is a trauma-informed nutrition therapist, eating disorder dietitian, stress recovery coach, and nutrition counseling skills teacher.She walks beside people who want to heal their relationship with food and weight and feel safer and less stressed in their bodies. Her testimony of recovery from eating disorders, trauma, and the New Age is meant to bring glory to God's mercy and grace. Since 2006, she has guided people one-on-one and in groups in healing from disordered eating and chronic dieting, many of which also have other stress-related conditions. Tracy also provides trauma-informed and body image training and supervision to health professionals.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:01:50]: Tracy, I'm glad you're here. I'm so excited to get into this. this topic that is hard and relatable and needed. We need to discuss this stuff. So before we get into that, though, we like to kick off our show with a question of what old school item from back in the day do you miss?
Old School Item: The Red Walkman
Tracy Brown [00:02:10]: I did think about this because you asked me beforehand. And you know what I miss? I remember loving so much. You know, we have our phones for our music and for everything. But I loved having my little red Walkman with the little Kind of half-dollar size little, you know, um, earphones.Chrissy Kirkman [00:02:28]: Yes.
Tracy Brown [00:02:28]: It just made me so happy. I was trying to think of something that was simple that I thought it was— I got it, had it going on, you know, to have that little Walkman.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:02:35]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:02:35]: Put a tape in and you can hear the radio, the 3 radio stations you could get. And, um, how sweet and simple that was. I know that's not, um, off the charts, but there's something just— you got— you had your own little space with whatever you wanted to do and listen to, and it was yours. And that was nice.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:02:51]: Yeah. It was nostalgic. You could just bebop around with your— with— and it's kind of like it had the foamy covers on the headphones, the earphones. Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:03:00]: Now that I'm talking about it, I'll just do a little addition. I don't know if y'all ever did this, but, um, my parents had the, um, the, the stereo system that was huge. The big 2 speakers, the speakers on each side with the big metal thing. You had to have furniture to contain it. Oh yeah, with the little record on it. And on Sunday mornings, I would put the— what was the country top whatever on, you know, on Sunday mornings and push record with 2 fingers, record and play on your— to record the country countdown. That was fun.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:03:31]: And oh, good.
Tracy Brown [00:03:32]: I know if you didn't listen to that, you had other music too, but that was like what you look forward to all week. So that's fun too.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:03:38]: Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's very nostalgic. I really liked old school country. That reminds me of my grandparents and growing up. Oh, That's so sweet. That's a good memory. Well, I don't know how you transition from that into the topic of trauma. It's hard.
Tracy Brown [00:03:55]: Yeah.
What Is Trauma?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:03:56]: It's so difficult. What— so I think let's just start simple because, you know, I know the word trauma is, is used more often now than I've ever heard in my whole life. And sometimes it's not used in the proper way. So how would you define, like, what if I'm just asking, What is trauma? How would you explain trauma to us, Tracy?Tracy Brown [00:04:20]: Well, so yeah, you're right. Traditionally, you hear the word trauma and you think of somebody in war or an accident. Yeah. And the researchers who study this, they're like, well, it's bigger than that and it's different than that in terms of it's a very personal experience. And you look at someone who may be having like flashbacks or memories or things like that, and they're like 15 years old. They didn't go to war. They weren't in a train accident or a car crash. Why are they acting like someone who's having similar symptoms of PTSD coming back from a war? So, you know, they— people's experience in reporting has made them study it more to understand, well, what causes it so that we can define it more broadly.
Tracy Brown [00:05:07]: Because it can happen to anyone at any time, from preverbal to the end of life. And then we all have different ways of experiencing it. And so we're familiar with war, and I'll say it again, war, accidents, even medical. I think most time we're aware of like, oh, a surgery that went wrong and we woke up for it. So we're getting that.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:05:27]: Mm-hmm.
Tracy Brown [00:05:28]: But what is really important, I think, is broader. You can witness something really horrific It not happened to you, but you saw it, and it's not tenable for your little or adult mind to deal with. Or the way I see it in practice really is these experiences are preverbal, which 3 and under probably, or when you don't have— it's called episodic memory. You don't remember it happening, but your body remembers it. So you're acting out from it.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:05:58]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:05:59]: Of threat responses that don't make sense to now time, but why in the world would this be happening? Um, so that's called relational trauma or attachment rupture trauma. Um, and then of course we can talk about diet trauma here all day long. What it's like to be told that you aren't enough.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:06:17]: Right.
Tracy Brown [00:06:17]: You're doing it wrong. You look wrong. On and on. You don't deserve to eat that. You shouldn't be eating that. You shouldn't be hungry for that. And that one time doesn't seem like trauma. But if that's your everyday life, every meal you're getting scrutinized, every time you change clothes in PE or go to the doctor, you're getting a lecture and you're not there for that, but you're getting it over time.
How Diet Culture Becomes Trauma
Tracy Brown [00:06:38]: That accumulates into this hypervigilant response and now you have trauma. And the definition that I've seen some of the researchers use, Peter Levine used this term or this phrase. He said trauma is not so much in the event, It's what happens inside of us in the absence of a compassionate witness. So you're overwhelmed, you're afraid, you feel intense shame, and there's no repair to that. It just is like you're experiencing it and there's nowhere for it to go, so it's stuck inside. And then you have to adapt to that experience outside of you or inside of you. To not be in so much pain. You just want a relief valve.Tracy Brown [00:07:23]: And those are defensive strategies that we'll talk about, I'm sure, with eating disorders.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:07:26]: Mm-hmm.
Tracy Brown [00:07:27]: That's those strategies. Any eating disorder thing, any mentality, any behavior is an adaptive strategy to too much or not enough inside or outside. So I hope that helps get a little wrangle in our minds around like, it's not just being in a car accident and now you're afraid to get in the car. It's I'm afraid to eat the meal because I had 20 years of being criticized about consuming. So I don't want to consume, or if I consume, it's got to be in secret. So now you're eating in a threat response just to stay alive. It's not very— it's not normative, but we adapt because of those experiences.
How Do I Know If What I Went Through Was Trauma?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:08:07]: That's really helpful. I think that clears— I mean, at its basic form, that helps us to see. But how— what if there's people thinking, well, how do I know if what I've gone through is considered trauma? Because many people, I think a lot of times we wanna minimize the things that we've gone through when in fact they really were, they mattered. They really were impactful. Many in a negative way. Um, they changed, yes, our course maybe a little bit. How, how would you, is there a way to know? I just, if it's trauma or if it's just, it was really bad.Tracy Brown [00:08:42]: Listen, it's your experience. If it has caused you to like, I can't eat normally. I don't digest normally. I'm afraid to go to social events because of what people might be thinking about me. And we're doing lots of projecting. You're right. If it changes the course of how you would interact, you don't have ease or peace, or you feel like you can't connect unless you perform, or love you unless you perform. I would say that's a problem because that's not God's design for us.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:09:08]: Mm-hmm.
Tracy Brown [00:09:09]: We're meant to be in connection. And if we're trying to do something to prevent ourselves from getting hurt versus don't have any trust with anything or anybody, I would say that's a rupture and it's not okay. Even though you're used to it, just because you're used to it doesn't mean it's not a problem, right? That's it. And if you look at yourself, your circumstances, how you were treated, talked to—
Chrissy Kirkman [00:09:31]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:09:31]: Even helped, and it did more harm, I think it's a problem. And if you look at it from like, okay, if it didn't happen to me and this happened to somebody else at that age with that experience, what would you do or feel about that? I would be horrified. I would want to rescue them and get them out of there. I'm like, well, don't you think that's a problem?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:09:50]: There's so much compassion. When I, when I think of this topic, it's, it's, it can be hard to go there. I understand why so many people, we don't want to face some of the things that we've experienced. It was difficult. It was hurtful. It was sometimes scary. Um, and we did the best we could to deal with it. And to, so to think, okay, life's so, may some, for some people, maybe life's okay right now.
How Trauma Affects Food, Body Image, and Self-Worth
Chrissy Kirkman [00:10:19]: Maybe it's not. But there's this fear that like, I don't want it to get worse by going back and thinking about what I've gone through. Like, I'd rather put it out of my mind. Um, and so how does, how does trauma impact our relationship to food, to our bodies, our body image, our self-worth? I know that's a loaded question. There's so much that we can talk about there. But—Tracy Brown [00:10:44]: You're listening to this and you've been trying to do intuitive eating, eating from hunger and fullness, not grossing, like, not doing the gross-out face when you look in the mirror. And you've been trying to do that for more than about 6 months to a year, and you don't feel like you're getting anywhere.
That's a sign that like you can know what you need to do, but something in your body is not feeling safe enough to let that land. That's the reality. And we are going to have to look at— I'll call it soul wounds. We're gonna have to look at those wounds. We can't just— sometimes with the Lord, I want to get into the biblical of this because, you know, there are things that God wants us to clean up. He wants our participation in that because he needs us to Do that sanctification.
Tracy Brown [00:11:31]: And we can pray, and sometimes he's not gonna just like, bloop, magic dragon's gone, you know, out of our system, out of our nerves, out of our body, out of our mind. He wants us to— he wants to use that. And when we avoid it, we're not letting him. And then you're gonna see the blockages in different places in your life, whether it's recovery, your relationships, your finances, whatever.
Whack-a-Mole Recovery
Chrissy Kirkman [00:11:53]: Mm-hmm.Tracy Brown [00:11:53]: It's not that it's not a punishment. It's just like, that wasn't of him and we've got to let him have it. And if we avoid it, we can't let him have it. We can't let him work. Right. And that's just the basic thing. But how does it impact it? It's like if you're trying to do efforts, I call it the whack-a-mole recovery life, you know, where it's like you do some things and you get some relief and then a stressor happens and you're back to where you were. That's a sign that it's not done with you.
Tracy Brown [00:12:20]: You might know the right thing to do, but you can't consistently do it.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:12:23]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:12:23]: And there's physiology behind that. So we can talk about that, but that's a sign, like, uh, you've got some unfinished business. You can do the right thing, but will it stick when the next— God said it's gonna happen. You're gonna have trials, you're gonna have adversity. And every time you do, if you go back to that, I hate my body, well, I've gotta lose weight, I gotta be healthy, I gotta get fit. If you're having those thoughts again, that is still there because there's something inside.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:12:50]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:12:51]: That's being— it's using that to protect you from those threat responses again because you haven't learned how to deal with that response.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:12:57]: So it sounds like those are indicators that something's still not resolved, like there's another layer or multiple layers.
Tracy Brown [00:13:05]: Yes.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:13:05]: Deep that you need to go through.
Swapping One Behavior for Another Is Not Recovery
Tracy Brown [00:13:10]: Yeah. Yeah. Because most people don't— I mean, this was my experience where once I got through some renewing my mind, some of my thoughts about food weren't right. It was just diet culture stuff.Chrissy Kirkman [00:13:21]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:13:21]: I got it. And I also got it like, man, I really judge myself and others, and I didn't like that, but I couldn't stop doing it. It started to make me realize like, hey, I've got some stuff in me that if I don't hand over and first admit and repent for and feel the feelings of, I'm gonna keep doing this. I'm just gonna switch. So I'm not gonna be thin, I'm gonna be fit now. I'm not gonna be obsessive about working out, I'm gonna be— I'm gonna be a workaholic. Not that I chose those things, but it was just another Continuous jump to the next thing to avoid what needs to be healed. So that's not a life.
Tracy Brown [00:13:57]: That's not even recovery. That's like, well, I have less behaviors, but it's not embodied. It, it's like you're not renewed. You're just doing the right thing on the surface. It's like going to church, but you don't know the word. Yeah, it's kind of similar.
What Does God Say About Trauma?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:14:13]: So similar. That's very relatable. And you mentioned this about, you know, where, what does God say about, about trauma or about this in the Bible? Like, how can, where can we go to scripture to, to see what God says? Because I know he cares about this. He cares for us. He loves us.Tracy Brown [00:14:32]: Yes.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:14:32]: We are his masterpiece. He created us and knows every part of us and wants to help. Like, he isn't just stranding us, abandoning us. in our trauma and the things that we went through. So where— if someone's listening and they're just like, well, I, I don't feel like he cares, what hope can we give them?
Tracy Brown [00:14:53]: Well, I want to acknowledge that because that's very common. I know I had those same feelings of like, well, God, where were you when these heinous things were going down and happening to me? Where were you? And I had to get into the word really deeply about, well, why do these things happen?
What, you know, You know, because these open doors for this torment happen because of our own sin, but also the bad stuff that happens of people's free will against us. And then, you know, you can look down your lines like, oh yeah, we got a long line of these kind of like really yuck things that make us more vulnerable to those situations as well. You didn't do that. It's not your fault.
But he can't— we know he can't supersede human beings' free will. And so it's on us to like, I'm gonna have a relationship with you, um, because you are good. And sometimes these bad things happen because other people's not good.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:15:46]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:15:47]: I don't want to blame you, God. You know, let's put it where it belongs. One, this fallen world, and then two, other people hurt— hurt people hurt people. So I kind of, I had to wrestle with that for more than one moment. It took a little bit to like to know that, you know, I'm still here, so I know he didn't leave me. And if I wasn't here because those things, I'd be with him.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:16:10]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:16:11]: So there's that. But what the— what does the word say? I mean, we can do a quick little scripture search, and some things that always stand out that give me comfort is Psalm 107:13-16. Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death. and burst their bonds apart. This is big stuff. This is all even sort of relatable here. He let them— we let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wondrous works to the children of man, for he shatters the doors of bronze and cuts into the bars of iron.
Tracy Brown [00:16:45]: So this is definitely even sort of applicable, um, set of verses, right? Around like, yeah, you're in a jail, whether of our own making or something that happened to us or our own self-protection.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:16:56]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:16:57]: And He cares about that. And you just gotta cry out to Him in that darkness. And when it comes to trauma responses, sometimes that was the rescue. If you have to be in flight or people pleasing or dissociation to survive something, He put that in us to be able to do that. It's just not meant for long-term use, I call it. It's like, don't wear that Band-Aid forever. It gets kind of gross.
Recover Holiday Freedom
Chrissy Kirkman [00:17:16]: Yeah. Oh, hey, that's a good visual. We get that. Hey, real quick, I want to tell you about a new offering we have created at Finding Balance just for this season. It's called Recover Holiday Freedom. So if the holidays already have you bracing yourself instead of looking forward to them, if you're fearing comments about your plate or the diet talk before Thanksgiving even starts, you're not alone. And Jesus doesn't want it to be that way for you this Recover Holiday Freedom is an 8-week live group starting Tuesday, October 20th, and offering Christ-centered support for your relationship with food and body during a season when the pressure hits hard. It features video teaching from familiar old-school Food Freedom guests like Travis Stewart, Amy Carlson, Angelica Gonzalez, Heather Creekmore, and more.Chrissy Kirkman [00:18:12]: So for just $49, you can walk through this season supported, not alone. Now, space is limited and an application is required, so please don't wait. Head to findingbalance.com/community to apply. Okay, back to it.
Why We Build Survival Strategies Around Food
Tracy Brown [00:18:33]: We get that, right? It's like, ooh, that Band-Aid worked when you got really hurt, but you're not meant to hang on that one forever. We need to heal. That needs some air, that needs a light on it, that might need some medicine, but we don't hang on that forever.But when we don't have repair, when we weren't given skill sets as kids of like self-compassion and witnessing and attunement and prayer and getting the help we need as soon as possible, what do we do? We figure it out ourselves. We restrict, over-exercise, dissociate, and that becomes a habit of like any emotion, I check out. with whatever, those become strategies. So we did it our own way a really long time, but the Bible knows. I mean, in the Bible, God put it in here.
Tracy Brown [00:19:16]: Like, guess what? You're gonna figure— do it your own way for a little while, but I'm here when you're ready to like just walk out the door with what you've been doing.
How Do We Break Through?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:19:27]: So if someone has— they're listening to this and they're like, okay, I think what I went through might've been trauma. It was really bad. And then I also am struggling with chronic stress, or, um, yeah, I feel stuck and I can't seem to get myself to move my body with joy or at all. Or I'm, I'm struggling to eat in a more nourishing way. Or, you know, whatever that bond is, it, because it's bondage, like you said, it's, it's being in a, a trap.Tracy Brown [00:19:59]: Yeah.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:20:00]: A prison. whether we made it for ourselves or we find ourselves in it because it's a trap of diet culture, how can they break through? Do you have some steps to help us break through?
Tracy Brown [00:20:12]: Oh my goodness. It's such a— that's a big one. I mean, the things that my team and I end up doing is just as varied as you can imagine. But I think the first step is recognizing it doesn't matter. You don't have to call anything trauma. I don't even talk about that in the first sessions. It's just we just get a history. of your experiences.
Tracy Brown [00:20:32]: You know, I'm mentally tracking like what was too much, not enough, like bad things happen, no support, click, that happened at this age. This is what resulted with the food, you know, just making those notes. And we'll get to it when we, you know, at the time is right, you know, the Lord will reveal. And, um, you know, starting at a place we can start.
It's like, I— let's say a person comes in and they want to stop their food feeling so chaotic. Well, we gotta look at, well, where's the chaos happening? What are your thoughts? So we gotta work on some renewal of the mind. You know, there's, there's definitely a time and a place sometimes.
You know, I know we get really— especially, I know I've had a lot of people come to me with feeling like they— their behaviors are sinful and they have a lot of shame about this.
Tracy Brown [00:21:17]: Like, we're not going there right now. These are adaptive strategies. A lot of the things that you've heard in your head aren't your thoughts anyway, so we're not going there right now. What's happening in your body right now where you're feeling, I'm trying to sit down or I'm trying to figure out what to eat and I'm getting really revved up. Let's work with that activation in your nervous system cuz you're feeling like this idea is a threat.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:21:38]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:21:38]: And we just like kind of bird's eye view this together a second. What about, oh, like what is the function of this threat response right now? And like how familiar is this? Or what's the function of this feeling such a threat? Just let that open up from there. Then we figure out what we need to do. Is there repentance necessary? Is it just like, no, I need to like hear that those are not my thoughts and I don't have to do that anymore because it's 2023 and this came on board when this happened to me and I didn't have any other choice. Okay. That's not the same thing as like, oh, I'm choosing to be in this misery.
It's like we're participating in it, sure, but God knows the line between survival, and I don't— I know this is bad for me, but I don't want to let it go. I want to keep my pride.
Tracy Brown [00:22:26]: I want to do this. I'm like, those are different circumstances, and you're not doing that. So, um, gotta get a compassionate witness and speak life back into that, which is scripture sometimes. Sometimes it's just being really pragmatic of like, what do you need to do to provide more safety, a little more comfort, less fear? before you go to eat them? Or how are we going to do the grocery store? I mean, there's a thousand things that we can do, but it's all about building safety.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:22:51]: Oh yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:22:53]: Um, to bring— yeah, bring more safety in so there's less chaos, less fight, less fight, less fight, flight, freeze, or please. If you don't deal with that, I don't know anybody unless the Holy Spirit's like boom, right on you at that moment to get you out of that threat response. And you can think to like, oh, I need to pray scripture. I gotta run to get my app or my Bible and cry out. Like, I don't remember to do that when I first started. I was just so much in like one feeling, boom, I'm gonna restrict. Oh, I don't like— I don't— I feel uncomfortable here. I'm gonna like binge, go exercise, whatever.
Tracy Brown [00:23:27]: I was just so autopilot. I needed to create some space between me and that threat response to see, do I need to be— Tigers? Do I wanna believe those thoughts? I have a choice now. I didn't have a choice then. I didn't think I had a choice, at least.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:23:41]: Right. We didn't think we had a choice. So now it sounds like what the key difference I hear when you describe that is there's a pause, there's a— you're slowing down to actually be aware of the present, speak truth. This is— you said this is 2023, and that was back in whatever. So there's one truth and, and, and kind of just grounding yourself, centering yourself with reality.
Tracy Brown [00:24:11]: Yeah.
Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Please
Chrissy Kirkman [00:24:12]: Because I feel like we go, you know, we just operate on autopilot. Um, and we, now you, you said fight, flight, please, or, oh, or freeze. Can you just briefly tell us what, you know, just describe that?Tracy Brown [00:24:29]: Yeah.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:24:29]: Because maybe people would wanna know, like, I don't really know what that looks like. Oh, and then they'll hear it and be like, oh, that's me.
Tracy Brown [00:24:36]: Yeah. So I'm going to describe those places, and I want to do a little bit, a brief introduction of like what our bodies do. So God does want us to like understand, this is how I made you to deal with threats. So it's not unbiblical. You know, here's the physiology, and then some of the things that we might be doing to manage that if we're— if we don't have enough safe people to be with, to talk to, to feel the presence of. to, um, get in scripture, to drop into prayer. I mean, those are healthy resources that don't cause us harm. But again, we've gotten over-coupled.
Tracy Brown [00:25:12]: This threat response, I do this thing and now that's my fake safety, but that's what I'm used to. So real briefly is that God made us a nervous system. If you happen to go want to have some fun and go to Google and look up, um, uh, an anatomy and physiology of like the nervous system, you'll see a bunch of wires that look like inside your body. That's kind of what it's like. God put that in there so we would be wise enough. If there's a tiger around the tree, you don't hang out there and get eaten, right?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:25:43]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:25:43]: So that's autopilot. Like, I like— God put like the tides in and out. God made that. Now you go do your thing. Same thing with our bodies. So you have a nervous system that neurocepts. It can sense without you are like, oh, I'm gonna sense this now. It's like it just does it behind scenes, you know, in the unconscious here is doing its thing, or unconscious, that like you're in the woods.
Tracy Brown [00:26:06]: I'll give you an example. So you're in the woods and you're by yourself and you hear a twig break. What usually happens? You're more alert, right?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:26:14]: Yeah, kind of freak out a little bit. What was that?
Tracy Brown [00:26:16]: Maybe. Yeah, maybe. Unless you're— then you get used to being in the woods, maybe you do less, maybe you're just more curious. We want to get there, right? But naturally, you're, you're somewhere and your nervous system is always scanning. You don't know it for signs signs of like basically friend or foe, safety or connection. That's good because God doesn't want you to be kind of a dummy and like, oh well, God's got me for everything, but there's a tiger right there and you don't have any sense to like—
Chrissy Kirkman [00:26:43]: Yeah, right.
Tracy Brown [00:26:44]: You need to climb a tree or you need to hide in a cave with a big rock in front of you, right? It's like he wants us to like do some basic stuff on our own.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:26:51]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:26:51]: And, uh, so our sympathetic nervous system All those nerves, all that, you know, sight, sound, touch, smell, whatever, proprioception, interoception, like what we feel inside. Its job is to like, okay, this is not okay. You need to go. So you'll run away. And signs of wanting to run away, you can be running away in your mind and racing thoughts. You can digestively just not have good gastric motility anymore. Everything feels like it just sits there. You're not digesting well.
Tracy Brown [00:27:23]: Your pupils are dilated. You don't have any saliva anymore. You don't feel like eating. Your appetite's gone. All those things can happen. And you can already hear how this will impact your food, right? I don't feel like eating. I hear that all the time.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:27:39]: Well, yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:27:39]: Because you've been stressed out since the moment you woke up. You're in flight. So flight is, I'm going to run away. If you can't run away from a threat, and you're forced to fight, you're gonna fight. If you're backed into a corner, you, you know, before you freeze and collapse, what you're probably gonna do first is find the biggest stick you can find and at least try to save yourself.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:28:00]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:28:01]: Right? You're probably gonna try to do that. And there's exceptions to that we'll talk about in a minute. So fight or flight, you do these things to escape the threat. Okay? If that doesn't work, your body will go into, it's called, there's another part of your nervous system. They don't run on or off. It's like a, Think of a dimmer switch. You've got, I can connect, I've got to protect by shutting, by running away or fighting, or I've got to protect by shutting down. So it's the dimmer switch on your wall.
Tracy Brown [00:28:27]: You got 3 little things here. You can do that. Okay? And they're always on in the background and you're always sensing like, I'm here with Chrissy and I, I know her a little bit, so I feel really safe and connected. I have a little sympathetic because, you know, I'm trying to be here, do a good job. So I got a little juice going. But I'm still not overactivated or hyperactivated. I'm good. But let's say that something goes down, like downhill real quick here, and I was connected with little juice, but all of a sudden I got— something happened and something got said and we both got really activated and there's no way out.
Tracy Brown [00:29:05]: And so one or both of us shuts down. And what that's going to look like is our facial features might get flat. Um, one of us might be either trying to please the other, or let's do the tiger example too. It's like, okay, the tiger's got you pinned and you can't get away. Since it's got teeth and claws, you can't really reason with it.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:29:23]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:29:24]: So you can't please it. Oh, please don't eat me. I'm not that good. Right. You're, you're not groveling here for, you know, nobody hurt me. So you're gonna, your body's gonna shut down. You literally will shut down your physical awareness and your body will start to numb out. Because there's 2 reasons for that.
Tracy Brown [00:29:40]: They're very biologically protective, and God was so awesome to do this for us. It's either the pain's not— you're not going to feel all of them, the full extent of it, and you won't remember it.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:29:51]: Hmm.
Tracy Brown [00:29:52]: Just in case you, you live through it, you're not going to remember all that horror. Or if you're not going to make it, okay, you will get to a place where you'll die of shock before— you won't, you won't experience being eaten alive. Let's just put it that way. I know this is pretty gross, but that's what happens, right? You don't— you won't— you won't fully frontally cognitively experience being alive. You will just black out and go home.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:30:15]: That's a merciful, loving God.
Tracy Brown [00:30:18]: Isn't it merciful?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:30:19]: Wow.
Dissociation: How God Designed the Body to Protect Us
Tracy Brown [00:30:20]: He put that ability to check out and dissociate in us. Okay. And then we also have part of that system helps us socially connect, and that's a little bit of please, but a lot of sympathetic. So anyway, The thing with human beings is that, you know, we're not always that powerful.You know, we have times in our life where we're little and overwhelming things are happening to us that are too much for our development, whether we're infants coming out of the womb, um, little, just kids.
And we start to learn like, well, the only way that I can deal with all this criticism, all this nitpicking All this rejection is to be pleasing or to shut down or to say, you know what, screw y'all, I'm gonna eat all the food and see how big I can get and you're gonna have to deal with it.
What Fight and Please Responses Look Like Around Food
Chrissy Kirkman [00:31:07]: Mm-hmm.Tracy Brown [00:31:07]: That's a fight response. A flight response would be to like be hypervigilant about your food and doing it right and being really compliant. And the compliant part would be some of the please too, like, yeah, you're right, I am too fat and gross. You're right, Mom, take me to Weight Watchers. That would be a please response because you had to push the pressure. Well, to survive that situation, I don't want to be bullied again and nobody seems to care, so let's just go with it. I must be terrible and gross and not okay. That's a please response.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:31:35]: And you lose your voice. You lose your voice, your almost like ability to speak up for yourself and advocate for yourself.
Tracy Brown [00:31:43]: Because you're too little. You're 10 and nobody's saying, you know, that's jacked. You should not have been bullied that way. there's no protection.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:31:50]: Right.
Tracy Brown [00:31:51]: There's no competent adults around to see like, oh, the solution to bullying isn't weight loss, it's advocacy and having a voice. You don't know how to do it if you don't see it. So you go along because that's how you're going to survive, or you're the best dieter in the room to survive. And again, these traumas are— it's all in perspective to how old you are and what resources you have. how you know how to deal with things. So that's why people diet. That's why people are addicted to dieting.
That's why no matter how many times they hear diets don't work, they want to do it one more time, because they haven't dealt with what the threat response underneath— if I don't, they won't let themselves actually feel and look at what's going to happen if I don't, because then they gotta feel all those times again.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:32:37]: Hmm.
Mercy, Forgiveness, and the Book of Ephesians
Tracy Brown [00:32:38]: But the merciful thing is with the Lord, it's like he's not going to make this take 20 30 years to get better. He wants to do it now with the support from people who know what they're doing, hopefully, to like, they know not what they do. These hurt people are hurting you because they don't know what they're doing. They were hurt too.Chrissy Kirkman [00:32:57]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:32:57]: And you don't have to feel that much like lack of awe and full forgiveness at the first step you do this, but it's just recognizing that like that happened to you and it's not your fault. and nobody around you clearly, you know, were in relationship with the Lord with this issue to know how to guide you through this really Ephesian kind of world. It's hard not being Ephesian in Ephesus. It's hard.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:33:25]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:33:27]: It takes a lot of, like, um, groundedness in yourself and, and what the Lord says about We're all going to get rejected because he was rejected in some way. And if you don't learn those lessons early on, you're trying to like figure out how to belong in a world that will— you need very little reason to get rejected. Yeah, it's gonna happen. And we're not raised up in the way we should go around this issue, so we're very vulnerable. We're very vulnerable.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:33:54]: And don't have the weapons, haven't been shown or taught about the weapons that we need to battle, to walk in this battle and And rise up victorious like the battle's already won, because it is. Yet we walk around super defeated.
Tracy Brown [00:34:09]: That's right. We walk around defeated because we forgot where we sit in heavenly places with Christ. Go back to read the whole book of Ephesians, everybody. Ephesians 1, how much he loved you before everything was made. And you have— you're here for a reason. The rest of it's like, and here's your weapons to deal with the arrows that are going to get slung your way because you're mine.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:34:29]: Beautiful.
Tracy Brown [00:34:29]: That's it. We're gonna get rejected because we're his. That's, that's kind of part of the gist of it, the game. And if we know that we're— this whole diet culture stuff is a total satanic system anyway. There's a reason it's got $70 billion and strong and going. It won't go away until he's— until this is done, he's gone. So if we accept that and accept that, wow, everybody I've ever known who still does this, and we know it doesn't work, They're programmed too. Yeah, everybody needs mind renewal, but they're not going to do it fast enough for you to be ready for you to do it, for you, you know, you to participate in this.
Tracy Brown [00:35:05]: So why not let yourself— you know what, I went through some really hard stuff and I don't want to reject myself. I don't want to reject anybody else. And these emotions that are stuck in there, the Lord wants to heal them like now.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:35:19]: Hmm.
Tracy Brown [00:35:20]: He doesn't want you dragging that around forever. And it's impacting your food, it's impacting your hunger and fullness. It's when you look in the mirror, you're not seeing yourself through the Lord's eyes, you're seeing it through all the conditioning you've ever had or experienced, all the bad stuff. And now that's your jail. It's not true. We gotta look at ourselves through spiritual eyes and not Ephesus eyes. That's going to continue your trauma.
Gentle Ways to Surrender
Chrissy Kirkman [00:35:44]: So Tracy, what are some— do you have some ways that we can surrender? Like, if they're— if, if people are hearing this today and they're thinking, okay, I see that I have some work to do. Like, I really do wanna be free. And if that freedom means I need to start facing some of these things, as much as I don't want to, as much as the thought alone makes my stomach turn.Tracy Brown [00:36:09]: Mm-hmm.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:36:10]: What, what are some gentle ways that people can take a next step to help them surrender and rely on God to heal this trauma? What it, you know, what could they do? Where could they turn? I mean, I know, I'll just say the first one I know is we have a Christian treatment finder, where there are professionals who are Christians, who, you know, have a kingdom mission against eating disorders. And they want to help you through this from a Christ-centered biblical perspective.
Tracy Brown [00:36:41]: So CEDCN.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:36:44]: It's the Christian Treatment Finder. You can search for Christian professionals that can help you through this. But Tracy, beyond that— and Tracy, you can find Tracy Brown on there as well— but what beyond that, what else would you, would you offer?
A First Step: Hand on Your Stomach
Tracy Brown [00:36:59]: I love that example, Christy. Let's just start it with like right now lived experience. You're listening to this and I, Tracy, and Christy are saying, yeah, it's time. We're going to have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable and your gut clenches. Put your hand on your gut.Chrissy Kirkman [00:37:12]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:37:12]: On your stomach right there, if you can tolerate that. If not, that's okay. And just let yourself know that that's your body giving you notice that there's something in there that needs to be heard. You're holding on to something that won't go away with, uh, pretending, with willpower. That's, that's a felt sense that there's something there that's telling you, yeah, I don't— and it's like, I've been here too long.
There's pain here, and Jesus died to heal you. Like, this is done, but we got to take hold of that by our participation. And I think the first step— okay, I've got some stuff in there and some reassurance that God is merciful, God is really patient.
Tracy Brown [00:37:56]: It's called renewal of the mind, it's called sanctification. You don't need to go from zero—
Chrissy Kirkman [00:38:00]: No.
Tracy Brown [00:38:01]: To 100 in 2 seconds. That's not a requirement. That's okay. That's the, that's the flight. I think that's the flight response, that all-or-nothing, black-and-white thinking kind of way of like, oh, I'm going to be really uncomfortable and I can't handle this. It's like, we only go as fast as the slowest parts can go. It's, it's one of those things that we have this, and I think we think that way because we've been programmed to be on programs. If you've been on a diet, you know, in 12 weeks you're supposed to have your best life ever.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:38:27]: Oh yeah, right.
Submit, Draw Near, Resist: James 4:7-10
Tracy Brown [00:38:28]: With sanctification, that's a lifetime. With healing lies good, but with eating disorder recovery, that doesn't have to take forever. But we have to look at like, what is the function of those thoughts that you have about yourself? And are they true? Just start questioning your thoughts. You know, James, is it 4:7-10, is submit yourself, draw near to God, he'll draw near to you, resist the devil and he'll flee.Chrissy Kirkman [00:38:55]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:38:55]: That's a process. You hear, like, there's 4 phrases here And I think they have to be done in that order.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:39:02]: Right.
Tracy Brown [00:39:02]: Yeah. Submit yourself. Yes, I've got whatever adversity, trauma. I was treated poorly and I need to quit gaslighting myself that that happened. You know, I gotta let it go that like, that maybe the places in the past even that I tried to get help, they didn't fully understand it. And it either— I did— it did nothing or made it worse. That's okay. God's got timing for everything, and we'll remove blockages to what we need.
Tracy Brown [00:39:28]: And I've seen it happen hundreds of times where it's like people didn't think they could, you know, work with so-and-so or work with me, and he provided all the way to be done that, you know. So we use a lot of reasons why we can't do it— time, all the finances, whatever, you know. This is of him, and he wants this, and he wants it now.
And this person, if we believe the word and what it says is true, we gotta believe it and trust him, for example. Um, I don't know, and there's so many things I could say about how to get started. It's just, it just acknowledged, like, you know, prayer alone hasn't fixed this, time hasn't fixed this, um, reading all the books hasn't fixed this. There's something here that I need clearly, because it's not because there's lack of effort.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:40:12]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:40:12]: It's not because there's lack of wanting that you haven't maybe gotten the full freedom, like the full embodied recovery yet. It's There's probably something missing, or there's something still too much inside. There's some kind of layer that if we can just acknowledge that, he'll lead us. But, you know, we got to participate.
Praying for the Next Step
Chrissy Kirkman [00:40:30]: Yeah. And to pray, to specifically begin praying, Lord, help me to take the next step to reach out to who it is you want me to work with, because I see I have prayed Lord, rescue me from this. But it's not going away. And it's not changing. And I feel worse as days go by. Instead, praying, Lord, help me take the next step. Help me see or connect with someone who can help me that's trained and professional and loves you and can direct me back to you. Because I want to heal and be free from this.Chrissy Kirkman [00:41:13]: And he will. That's Tracy and I both, for you listening. Tracy and I both have dealt with trauma. And we're, in some ways, Tracy, I can't speak for you, but I know that every now and then, things will come up, responses will come up within me. I'm not expecting it. And it's, it's, wow, I didn't expect, I, you know, I didn't expect for that to be my response. And I see that that's, you know, a past.
Tracy Brown [00:41:42]: Yeah.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:41:43]: trauma response I haven't— yeah, I haven't had to deal with in a while. So I have to pause and, and reflect, like, you know, what is going on here? What triggered that? What am I experiencing or feeling? Or what have I not dealt with? So just know that it gets better. There is freedom on the other side of this. And God will, will connect you with who, you know, who or what, where he wants you to be. And that was my full surrender cry out to God. I am in this pit. I know you're here. I know you see me and you love me.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:42:18]: I refuse to do this myself anymore. Like, I can't do this. Like, I'm giving it all to you. And that— I'm telling you, that kind of prayer, that changed my life forever. I have never been the same. It hasn't been easy, but things got better. With that kind of, that deep level of surrender.
Praying for the Root, Not the Symptom
Tracy Brown [00:42:39]: That's right. Yeah. You know, I was thinking about as you were talking, and it is when we're praying what we know from the word, his will for us. Yeah. Of course he's going to answer. Of course he's going to supply and provide that. So I have people, some like, yeah, I've been praying for weight loss for like 20 years, and here I am bigger than ever. And when I started praying, Lord, anything that's not of you, help me be willing to like let it go, let it go.Tracy Brown [00:43:07]: And then they got on the right track and, you know, they got closer to like the actual things that would help them with their food, with their identity, with their relationships, whatever it was, because they were praying for the symptom to go away, right?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:43:20]: Yes.
Tracy Brown [00:43:21]: Versus like, I want the root gone, I'm done. And so they put— we put aside like the things that we think that we need to be okay, the weight loss, the whatever, the better whatever. And like, I want to— I want the root of this. I want to understand it and I want to be done with it. And that's what he wants. He wants our freedom. So that's the kind of prayer you had. Look where I— you, you stopped praying for like the things, the, the things.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:43:47]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:43:48]: And prayed more about like what my destiny is. It's not this. It's not this jail cell, that's for sure. Your eating is a symptom.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:43:56]: Right. And I prayed for so many years for weight loss. So I can be a vessel for you, Father. Help me to lose this weight so I can do better for you and I can be healthier for you. And it was like I was praying and believing, longing for something. He could already use me exactly how I was, but I was searching for something new and different and better. Yes, you did. I'm doing air quotes.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:44:23]: You can't see the amount of air quotes I'm doing. But, um, yeah, but it was, it was false. Like, the enemy had things twisted in my mind. And so when I just gave it all up and said, Father, use me. There's breath in my lungs. I have a body that works. I have a voice that can speak. I have a mind that is sound.
The Last Time Tracy Felt True Freedom
Chrissy Kirkman [00:44:44]: Yes, I have some things in my past that I— you can help me deal with and process through. But Father, use me. Here am I, send me. Total game changer, friends. I'm telling you, total, total game changer. Tracy, so to wrap up our episode today, will you describe with us, to us, the last time you experienced true freedom?Tracy Brown [00:45:09]: This— I've been telling this story for the last 2 weeks. It just feels so profound. And it's not necessarily maybe what you think, but, um, okay. I, I like to admit to people, because I know some people who see us who've been on this path for 5 years, 20 years, you know, the best in our most imperfect way, like, um, trying to be disciples and, you know, really living a very recovered life, not just recovery forever, but recovered life. I think, oh, they see this version of us, but they don't see the other stuff. So I, I always out myself when I screw up because I want people to like not pedestalize, you know, not do that covet-to-dis comparison game. Like, no, I'm still pretty human. I'm just getting— I trip up less and I recover faster, that's all.
Tracy Brown [00:45:58]: But, um, at least I hope to think that. So last week, um, it won't feel like freedom to the end, but so last week, uh, my daughter does Gymnastics, and she's really struggling with a skill, and she's been struggling with the same skill for like a year and a half. And it's really some kind of like, I don't know, body felt sense thing. And I can see it happening, but I can't do it for her because I don't know how to do these skills. And she's really upset. So my husband and I both got kind of frustrated. So we spent all day on YouTube trying to figure out how to help her have a felt sense in her body to do this skill.
And I caught myself starting to like— I'm not gonna curse, but like, um, ranting and raving about like, I can't believe I was being— so I was being offended.
Tracy Brown [00:46:42]: I can't believe that I'm spending all my Sunday trying to figure this out when we pay these people to like be the experts to help her like learn this skill so she's not like— she's progressing. And like, God was showing me in this a blind spot that I knew I had, but I just hadn't dealt with it yet. And I was ranting, I was going on and on and on, they're being lazy and apathetic. And I was like, whoa. Thankfully the Holy Spirit showed up and, you know, immediately I repented because one, this is not loving your neighbor. Two, this is taking offense.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:47:15]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:47:15]: Three, terrible example for, you know, how to deal with difficult people that we're all on that same page with. You know, you can— this shows up in all kinds of areas of life. Me being judgmental and prideful, all the things. I could probably list more. I'll just keep it short.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:47:32]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:47:32]: And I caught it and I repented for every single one in front of her and why I did what I did, why my response was what it was. And it's like, you know, I struggle. I do struggle sometimes when there's people seeing things go wrong and not doing anything about it, just walking by like it's not happening. That, that's hard for me.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:47:50]: Yeah.
Tracy Brown [00:47:50]: And it's all on me being over here being kind of righteous versus just Doing what needs to be done in humility and letting it go.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:47:59]: Hmm.
Tracy Brown [00:48:00]: And I can't tell you, in the past I would have been like so mortified and self-rejecting and, uh, self-condemning. And that's not of him either. I was just like humble, like, Lord, thank you for humbling me. And this feels really, really good. But you could only get to that place when you've already been practiced at being willing to be uncomfortable. So that's the most— that is the most I felt free in a really long time. And it's not a happy story. It's a like, oh God, your promises are true.
Tracy Brown [00:48:32]: It is better to be in that humble position, even if you have to eat pie first.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:48:36]: Right, right.
Tracy Brown [00:48:38]: No matter how hard you're trying to be good, we all, we all stumble. Um, and when we know better, we stumble. So I love telling that story because it's like Isn't that nice to like not be so— you're so great. No, we're great sometimes, and sometimes we suck, right?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:48:53]: Sometimes things are just difficult.
Tracy Brown [00:48:56]: I don't know if that helps anybody hear that, like, as much— you might even know the right thing and you don't do what you, you know, your conscience is, the Holy Spirit is, that God will use it anyway. No matter how bad your past is, no matter how much you're like, oh, 10,001 treatment centers. So what? You're here right now. You'll learn some new stuff today. And let him have it. And let people who aren't going to judge you for that— let their care in. I'm not going to judge you.
Closing Thoughts and Prayer
Chrissy Kirkman [00:49:27]: That's so good. Tracy, thank you for being here. I'm so glad you were here to just talk about a difficult subject. And hopefully people will, um, feel, you know, feel led to pray in a different way to the Lord about, about whatever it is they're going through, and that he will give them, you know, the courage and direction to take the next step they need to take toward freedom. And we are praying for you. We pray for our listeners. And if you need prayer, prayer@findingbalance.com, you can email us at, you know, prayer@findingbalance.com anytime, and we will pray for you. Thanks again, Tracy.Tracy Brown [00:50:06]: Thank you so much, Kristen.
Outro
Chrissy Kirkman [00:50:12]: Thank you for listening to the Old School Food Freedom Podcast. For over 20 years, Finding Balance has been helping people walk in freedom by discovering where Jesus fits into their struggles with food and body image. If you want more biblical truth and encouragement, head on over to findingbalance.com and subscribe to our free daily vitamin devotional.
While you're there, explore our Christ-centered Lasting Freedom online course and small group tools. You can help keep this ministry going by donating today at findingbalance.com. See you next time. The content in this podcast is for informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, or prescribe a particular course of action.
If you or someone you care about is battling an eating disorder, and is experiencing unmanageable thoughts or feelings, please call 911 if in the US or visit your nearest emergency room.
More about the Old School Food Freedom Podcast
In today’s diet-culture society, food issues and body hatred have become the norm. But you were created to be FREE. Welcome to Old School Food Freedom, where we go back to the basics, God’s basics, for how we view food, our bodies, and our worth.
Hosted by FINDINGbalance Executive Director Chrissy Kirkman, this podcast features Biblically sound experts, thought leaders, artists, and everyday people who will inspire you to interrupt negative cultural soundtracks and rediscover God’s original design for your relationship with food and your body.
This show will deliver practical, faith-filled insights on how to break free from diet culture and body shame through the lens of Scripture. If you’re looking for guidance on how to heal your relationship with food while deepening your faith, you're in the right place.
We’ll answer questions like
What does the Bible say about food freedom?
How can I overcome an eating disorder or disordered eating with Jesus?
What is the biblical perspective on diet culture?
How can I find peace with food as a Christian?
What does it mean to treat your body as a temple in relation to eating?
How can I break free from diet culture with Jesus?
How can I align my eating habits with biblical teachings?
What are the first steps to finding food freedom in Christ?
This podcast is for anyone ready to walk away from diet culture and into the freedom that Christ offers. Whether you’re recovering from an eating disorder, disordered eating, wrestling with body image, or simply craving a more peaceful relationship with food, this space was made for you.
If you want to experience true food freedom with Jesus, this podcast will give you the encouragement, truth, and tools to do just that.
