Overcoming Diet Culture: Jealousy vs Envy, Explained with Dr. Alisa Shanks
"Diet culture wants to destroy our time, our energy, our hearts, and our souls."
Diet culture doesn't care that you just made it through the holidays. It's already telling you the year isn't off to a good enough start, and that a fresh comparison list is waiting for you the second January hits. If you've felt that specific pull toward envy this month, the itch of watching someone else's before-and-after or someone else's body, this episode names exactly what that is and gives you something better to do with it.
Chrissy is back with Dr. Alisa Shanks, clinical psychologist and FINDINGbalance® Board Chair, for part two of protecting your heart against the January diet frenzy. Part one covered the armor of God as a framework for standing firm. This episode goes deeper into what to do with the jealousy and envy that diet culture stirs up this time of year, using tools from clinical psychology and scripture side by side.
Here's what we cover:
The difference between jealousy and envy, straight from Dr. Marsha Linehan's Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skills training: jealousy protects what you already have, and envy chases what someone else has
Why post-Christmas comparison hits so hard, and how something as small as a Lexus commercial can quietly plant discontent
A two-step practice for catching jealousy and envy before they take over: notice it, then name it out loud
The untrained puppy metaphor for your mind, and why disciplining your thoughts works the same way as training a dog you actually love
2 Corinthians 10:3-5 and what it means to take every thought captive and make it obedient to Jesus, as a daily, repeatable skill instead of a one-time decision
John 14 and Luke 21:34 on refusing to let your heart be troubled or weighed down, and the reminder that Jesus wouldn't ask you to do something He hasn’t already given you the ability to do
Galatians 5:1 and Ephesians 3:14-20, read together as a picture of what freedom from diet culture is actually supposed to feel like
Practical next steps if this episode stirred something up, including the Lasting Freedom course, the Christian Treatment Finder, and the FINDINGbalance prayer groups
Dr. Shanks hands you a way to catch the thought, call it what it is, and take it to Jesus before it turns into another January spent measuring yourself against someone else's highlight reel. Overcoming diet culture means training your mind toward truth on the ordinary days, so it's already there for you on the hard ones.
"Jealousy focuses on protecting what we have. Envy focuses on working hard to obtain what other people have." - Dr. Alisa Shanks
If this is the season you finally trade the diet cycle for real food freedom, we've got you: FINDINGbalance® is offering a huge discount on the Lasting Freedom participant bundle with code OSFFVIP! And if you need someone to pray with you through any of this, email prayer@findingbalance.com. You don't have to have the right words. "I'm struggling, please pray for me" is enough.
We’d love to hear your thoughts, so please drop us an email at admin@findingbalance.com, send us a voice message via SpeakPipe, or you can also subscribe for more practical episodes coming your way.
More About Dr. Alisa Shanks
Dr. Alisa Shanks has been a licensed clinical psychologist in Colorado since 2004, having built her career around three deep passions: her faith, eating disorder recovery, and university mental health. She has served at Biola University and the University of Colorado at Boulder, and currently serves as Director of the Larry Crabb Center for University Counseling at Colorado Christian University in Lakewood. Dr. Shanks believes wholeheartedly in full eating disorder recovery and brings that conviction to everything she does. She also serves as Chair of the FINDINGbalance® Board of Directors and brings over two decades of clinical expertise to her role. Alisa has been married for 25 years and has 2 teenage sons.
Connect with Dr. Alisa Shanks
Christian Treatment Finder Profile
Mentioned References
Dr. Marsha Linehan's DBT Skills Training for Jealousy
The Real Cost of Beauty Report by Dove
Mentioned Scriptures
Romans 15:13, Exodus 20:2-17, John 10:10, 2 Corinthians 10:3-5, John 14:18-27, Luke 21:24, Galatians 5:1, John 15:9-11, Ephesians 3:14-20
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CHRIST-CENTERED RESOURCES TO HELP YOU FIND FREEDOM
The Daily Vitamin eDevo: A free devotional with bite-sized truth emailed 5 days a week
Community Groups: Find connection with prayer groups and our Hello, Freedom! community.
Christian Treatment Finder: Connecting you with Christian providers experienced in treating eating issues.
Lasting Freedom Online Course: A Christ-centered, non-diet course to work through false beliefs about food and weight so you can live free from disordered eating and body image issues.
CREDITS:
Intro music by “MokkaMusic” – Old Jeans (Funk)
Production & Editing by Marketing With Wisdom
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The content in this podcast is for informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, or prescribe a particular course of action. If you have, or suspect you may have, an eating disorder, please consult your healthcare provider. If you desire to receive faith-based care, visit ChristianTreatmentFinder.com to browse professionals with a Kingdom campaign against eating disorders.
More about the Old School Food Freedom Podcast
In today’s diet-culture society, food issues and body hatred have become the norm. But you were created to be FREE. Welcome to Old School Food Freedom, where we go back to the basics, God’s basics, for how we view food, our bodies, and our worth.
Hosted by FINDINGbalance Executive Director Chrissy Kirkman, this podcast features Biblically-sound experts, thought-leaders, artists, and everyday people who will inspire you to interrupt negative cultural soundtracks and rediscover God’s original design for your relationship with food and your body.
This show will deliver practical, faith-filled insights on how to break free from diet culture and body shame through the lens of scripture. If you’re looking for guidance on how to heal your relationship with food while deepening your faith, you're in the right place.
We’ll answer questions like
What does the Bible say about food freedom?
How can I overcome an eating disorder or disordered eating with Jesus?
What is the biblical perspective on diet culture?
How can I find peace with food as a Christian?
What does it mean to treat your body as a temple in relation to eating?
How can I break free from diet culture with Jesus?
How can I align my eating habits with biblical teachings?
What are the first steps to finding food freedom in Christ?
This podcast is for anyone ready to walk away from diet culture and into the freedom that Christ offers. Whether you’re recovering from an eating disorder, disordered eating, wrestling with body image, or simply craving a more peaceful relationship with food, this space was made for you.
If you want to experience true food freedom with Jesus, this podcast will give you the encouragement, truth, and tools to do just that.
The unedited transcript for this episode of Old School Food Freedom
New Year, New Freedom
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:01:21 - 00:01:24]: Yes. New year, new freedom. That's this.Chrissy Kirkman [00:01:25 - 00:01:25]: Hey.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:01:25 - 00:01:27]: Instead of all that other garbage.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:01:28 - 00:01:28]: All right. Love it.
The Power of Trusting God
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:01:29 - 00:01:57]: So I wanna start with some scripture. And this verse, Romans 15:13, I think we've mentioned it in prior podcasts, but this has become a theme verse in my life. It reads, may the God of hope fill you With all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.Chrissy Kirkman [00:01:58 - 00:01:58]: Hmm.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:01:58 - 00:02:23]: And it's just so powerful, right? I love the beauty that the only part that we have to do is trust. It says the God of hope will fill us with all joy and peace. I don't know about all of our listeners, 'cause I certainly couldn't know about them, but we just made it through the holidays.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:02:23 - 00:02:23]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:02:24 - 00:02:43]: Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas, New Year's Eve, New Year's. We just survived, hopefully thrived through all that time. How many of us are right now in the middle of January feeling full of joy and peace? It's a good question.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:02:44 - 00:02:45]: That is a great question.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:02:45 - 00:03:22]: It's a good question. Um, but God is promising us in this verse that he is the one to fill us up with joy and peace while we trust in him, so that we may overflow with hope by the power of the Spirit. It's not up to us. It's not a pull yourself up by your bootstraps message. The only piece where we are an active agent is choosing to trust. And it's hard. There are hard circumstances. There are hard life moments where trusting is hard.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:03:22 - 00:03:30]: But this promise is that God is gonna fill us with hope, hope over hopelessness, right?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:03:30 - 00:03:30]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:03:30 - 00:03:41]: Peace over envy, joy instead of jealousy. So, I would love to take us full-blown old school and go all the way back to—
Chrissy Kirkman [00:03:42 - 00:03:42]: Come on!
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:03:42 - 00:03:46]: The Ten Commandments. So, we're gonna hit some Old Testament.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:03:46 - 00:03:49]: Get it, girl? This is how we do it!
Lessons from the Ten Commandments
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:03:49 - 00:04:30]: Old school right here. So, right, the Ten Commandments are at the beginning. Moses is coming down off the mountain. The Israelites are wandering in the desert, trying to become the people that God needs them to be. Before they move into the Promised Land. And that is— I've heard preaching on this where they talked about the transformation from being a nation of slaves who were oppressed to moving into a nation of conquerors that were ready to take over the land that God had given them. So this is in Exodus 20, verses 2 through 17. I will not read the whole passage, I promise.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:04:30 - 00:05:01]: But we're gonna hit some of these key elements in the 10 Commandments. Commandment 1 starts with, I am the Lord your God. And then it says, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery, and you shall have no other gods before me. And as I think about 2023, and we've talked a lot in our last episode about diet culture on steroids. I think about disordered eating and eating disorders as slavery.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:05:01 - 00:05:01]: Yes.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:05:02 - 00:05:49]: Because we can be enslaved to messages and ideas and behaviors and practices that are harmful to our bodies and souls. The next commandment is, you shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth or in the waters below, and you shall not bow down to them or worship them. And we talk about these as idols, right? Do not make an idol. And Satan really has given us an idol, and that is a beauty image ideal that we are all supposed to— according to Satan's worldview, we are supposed to meet that in order to have worth. And that is a lie from the pit of hell.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:05:50 - 00:05:54]: Pit of hell. We're not even buying it anymore. I'm just so tired of it. No, I'm over it.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:05:54 - 00:06:29]: We're done. We're done. So, there, of course, there's lots of commandments here in the 10 Commandments, and God wants us to keep the Sabbath holy and rest our hearts, minds, bodies, and souls. And I love that. That is his provision. I've heard that talked about in terms of this nation of slaves where there was no rest, right? You would just die working. And that he said, I want to provide you rest. I am a God of nurture, a God of comfort, And a God who knows that our bodies need a Sabbath.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:06:31 - 00:06:55]: Then we move into the last one is, you shall not covet. And it goes into, don't covet your neighbor's house. Don't covet your neighbor's wife, or his male or female servant, or his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor. Now, I don't know about you, Chrissy, but I am thankful that we are not in a place where we are dealing with male and female servants in the bulk of our culture.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:06:55 - 00:06:55]: Right.
Modern Applications of Coveting
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:06:57 - 00:08:05]: And I'm not worried about my neighbor's ox or donkey because they don't have them. But the message here is around, do not covet, do not desire, do not lust after things that you don't have. And I would say that in this arena, we are talking about coveting a size and shape that is held up as this beauty image ideal. And for some people, based on their story, their body, their genetics, their activity, that is more attainable than it is for other people. But here in the original space where God says, I am the Lord your God, no other gods before me, no idols, and don't covet, I think that really is an old school message for us. to consider as we are starting this new year. One of the things I want to distinguish is the difference between jealousy and envy. And I found these definitions.
Understanding Jealousy and Envy
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:08:06 - 00:09:03]: I'm trained in a type of therapy called dialectical behavior therapy, DBT. It was originally created and designed to help people who struggle with borderline personality disorder. Dr. Marsha Linehan is out of the University of Washington, and she created, designed, and researched this And the DBT skills training really helps actually all people, because it helps us in areas of mindfulness, interpersonal effectiveness, emotion regulation, and distress tolerance. So we're going to talk a little bit about some of the things that she incorporated in that skills manual today, because it's so practical and tangible. But I wanted to be sure to denote where these definitions are coming from because they are not mine. So the first one is jealousy. And she says that jealousy focuses on protecting what we have.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:09:04 - 00:09:31]: So it reacts to people who threaten to take away relationships or things that are important to us. So we are jealous to protect what we already have. Envy focuses on working hard to obtain what other people have, and it reacts to others getting or having things that we do not have, but that we want or that we believe that we need. Do you, can you see?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:09:31 - 00:09:33]: Yep. Wow. Okay. I'm just gonna stop.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:09:33 - 00:09:34]: Yeah.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:09:34 - 00:09:50]: I'm like, okay, I needed to know this. I had not ever heard of this. I guess I would've thought. I'm envious. I'm jealous because I'm envious. But this, wow. Like I need time to process this. Good.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:09:50 - 00:10:51]: It is. So jealousy is around protecting what we have, and envy is working hard to get what other people have. But neither jealousy nor envy come from the Lord, right? So those are tools of that ugly thief, the devil. Because they are rooted in discontent. And as we think about our message of joy over jealousy, peace instead of envy, and hope instead of hopelessness, we are then choosing the promises of God, right? We are choosing that God fills us with joy and peace and overflows us with hope. through his power as we trust. But we live in a culture that promotes competition, comparison, envy, and jealousy. And those are tools of the devil.
Navigating Post-Holiday Envy and Comparison
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:10:52 - 00:11:20]: And especially right now in New Year's, another thing that we, you know, haven't talked about is the post-Christmas envy. There are whole schools of thought that talk about, especially little kids, Like, don't tell your little kids that the big present was from Santa because they go back to school and the other kids got like nothing at all. And then your kid just got a motorcycle from Santa. And then the other kid thinks they're not loved.Chrissy Kirkman [00:11:20 - 00:11:20]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:11:21 - 00:12:39]: So this is a season of envy, a season of, oh, you got that for Christmas? I didn't get that. for Christmas. Oh, you went on this vacation? I couldn't even afford an vacation, a vacation because of inflation and Christmas and whatever else. And so, you know, and even the jealousy and envy, the fear of losing things that are important to us, or the desire to obtain things we want around like comparison where, well, I didn't have anyone to spend Thanksgiving with, or my Thanksgiving was a disaster. Or, you know, all those different things. As we come through this holiday season, there is so much space for the devil to wreak havoc in this comparison and being envious that people have had different experiences than we have had, or different opportunities than we have had. And as we think about joy, peace, and hope, That is not what God wants for us. He would want us to celebrate that, you know, some people had this opportunity and we didn't, and that's okay.
Practical Tips for Addressing Jealousy and Envy
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:12:40 - 00:13:21]: So as we think about practical ways to address this jealousy and envy that's coming up, whether it's, you know, concerns about somebody— I always react to like the commercials. I know specifically that like Lexus does end-of-year commercials where there's like a big old bow on the car. And this is right, this is the end of the year, you know, an event to remember, the Lexus blah blah blah. And I just think to myself, there are people probably that get a brand new Lexus for their holidays, but that would be more unusual. And it's, it's not a place of envy or jealousy for me.Chrissy Kirkman [00:13:22 - 00:13:22]: Right.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:13:22 - 00:14:27]: But I'm always surprised by that advertising, right? Even advertising that's like, You know, here, treat your somebody to a new car. So as we think about practical tips in this season, the first thing we want to do is just notice, right? So we want to observe and acknowledge any jealousy or envy that's bubbling up in us, any comparison, negativity, um, or the desire to be in a different body than the body you're in, or that envy, somebody did get the new car and somebody else did go on the vacation. And if that was you, then we will be grateful with you. But recognizing these sensations. So first we notice it, right? We observe it and notice it. Then we acknowledge it, right? And give words to it. These ideas, these thoughts, these feelings, this jealousy, envy, criticism, competition. That creates discontentment.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:14:28 - 00:14:34]: And discontentment is not from heaven's team. That's from the other team.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:14:34 - 00:14:34]: Right.
Abundant Life vs. Dieting
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:14:34 - 00:15:00]: So John 10:10 says, the thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy. I have come that they may have life and have it abundantly. And there's so much beauty to the abundant life that God wants for us. Dieting and abundance do not fit together.Chrissy Kirkman [00:15:00 - 00:15:02]: No. Right?
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:15:02 - 00:15:30]: Dieting is restricting. Dieting is ignoring your hunger and fullness cues. Dieting is following somebody else's plan that tells you what, when, how, and how much that you can eat and trying to ignore and suppress your own hunger and fullness cues. Diet culture wants to destroy our time, our energy, our hearts, and our souls. So what do we do, right? This comes up.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:15:30 - 00:15:31]: Yeah.
Training the Mind: The Puppy Metaphor
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:15:31 - 00:16:34]: We, we sense it, we feel it. Some of us have been out shopping for the holidays and running into people and, and also being inundated by billboards and ads and products and, you know, all the cultural crazy of The emphasis on spending at Christmas, the consumerism of Christmas. And so when you notice these jealous or envious feelings, the goal is to turn our mind to the Word, turn our mind to Jesus. In the last episode, we talked about the Word of God in the context of the armor of God, being our only offensive weapon. And we, Chrissy, we have to train our mind. And this is another concept from the DBT skills. It's one of my favorites, and I know you're a dog lover, so you're gonna love this illustration. So, hey, an untrained mind is like an untrained puppy.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:16:36 - 00:16:45]: So puppies, They're impulsive, right? I know you've raised puppies. So what would happen if you left your puppy in an untrained state?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:16:46 - 00:16:54]: Uh, I would have an absolute breakdown. Yes. It would be a disaster. The house would be destroyed. Shoes would be destroyed.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:16:54 - 00:16:54]: Yeah.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:16:54 - 00:16:55]: Things would be everywhere.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:16:55 - 00:16:56]: Yeah. Yes.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:16:56 - 00:16:56]: Chaos.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:16:56 - 00:16:59]: There, there, there would be a mess. There would be piddle.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:17:00 - 00:17:00]: Yep.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:17:00 - 00:17:01]: There would be things.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:17:02 - 00:17:06]: So I was trying to think of how to say that properly. Yeah. It would be everywhere.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:17:06 - 00:18:01]: It would be a mess, right? And you can't, your dogs would not be good dogs if you left them undisciplined, if you left them in that untrained state. And there's a verse where the Bible talks about God disciplines us and we must discipline our children, right? Discipline is from the Lord. We need discipline. So with the concept is mindfulness, and I know that some Christians trip over that, but there's a lot of mindfulness throughout the Bible. And the idea here is not like emptying your mind. That's not the kind of mindfulness we're talking about. What we're talking about is turning your mind to God's Word and learning to tell it where to go. It's really easy to see those before and after pictures we were talking about in the last episode, and then look at them.
Taking Thoughts Captive and Turning to Christ
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:18:01 - 00:18:20]: I also think it's funny because like in the first one, They're not like tan and they don't have any makeup on and their hair's a mess. And in the after, they've gone and done the spray tan and they've done their nice makeup and their hair looks amazing. So, you know, it's not just the size and shape, it's the overall presentation.Chrissy Kirkman [00:18:20 - 00:18:20]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:18:20 - 00:18:44]: Which I think is ironic. But in this, we have to learn that when we are bombarded and we have those thoughts and feelings of jealousy and envy. to take them to Christ and to tell our mind where to go. If we let our mind wander all over the place like an impulsive puppy—
Chrissy Kirkman [00:18:44 - 00:18:46]: squirrel, right? Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:18:47 - 00:19:09]: We are in trouble. We're in trouble. And, and we have to discipline our mind and tell it, don't you walk that path of body criticism. Don't you walk that path Of counting your calories today? Don't you walk that road of telling yourself that you're only worthy if you burn off every calorie you consumed?
Chrissy Kirkman [00:19:10 - 00:19:10]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:19:10 - 00:19:44]: Those messages are lies. So this skill of turning your mind is where you take this impulsive brain that we have that is so easily distracted, and you begin to train it to go to Christ. You begin to train it that when you observe someone or something that you want, or experience a fear that someone's going to take away something that you have, that you take those thoughts and fears to the cross.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:19:44 - 00:19:44]: Yes.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:19:45 - 00:20:40]: And that is a process of turning your mind, and you have to practice it. So it would be choosing to say, I will trust in Jesus, going to, you know, Romans 15:13, the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him. Focus on, you know, I have come that they may have life and have it abundantly. There's 100 million verses that you could use to encourage your soul. And that is part of a skill called turning your mind. And the Bible even teaches it here in 2 Corinthians. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 reads, For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:20:41 - 00:21:42]: On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. That is turning the mind, taking captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. I actually learned this verse from a friend of mine at an agency where I worked in Wichita. And she used it in couples therapy because when you're struggling with your partner or your spouse, one of the ways you can really go off track is by allowing your mind to go down that path of negativity. Yes. Oh. Allowing your mind to go down the entitlement space of, he's such a jerk, or she's such a jerk, and I deserve better.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:21:42 - 00:21:43]: and blah, blah, blah.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:21:43 - 00:21:43]: Right.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:21:43 - 00:22:25]: And so she really anchored us around, take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ. And the thoughts, the envy, the jealousy, the diet culture, the comparison, that stuff is not from Christ. And so we have to engage in mindfulness. We have to engage in turning our mind and training our crazy little untrained puppy and getting it to follow the right path, because we won't— we don't want piddle all over the floors.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:22:25 - 00:22:25]: Yeah.
Daily Practices and Resources
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:22:25 - 00:22:48]: So we have to take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. And it takes practice. We have to do this One of the things that Marsha teaches in DBT is to practice skills while things are going smoothly, so that then when things are not going smoothly, it's right there in your back pocket ready to use.Chrissy Kirkman [00:22:48 - 00:22:49]: Yeah. Good.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:22:49 - 00:23:03]: So practice daily, get that daily vitamin, change that feed, follow encouraging, loving, kingdom-building people. And get your nose in the Word.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:23:04 - 00:23:25]: I wanna say real quick, Elisa, you just mentioned the Daily Vitamin. So I wanna make sure people know that you don't mean a specific supplement. You're talking about the Daily— I just heard it and I was like, uh, what if someone doesn't know? The Daily Vitamin is an, is an e-devotional that we send 5 days a week to your email. So that's what she was referring to.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:23:26 - 00:23:28]: I am not talking about supplements.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:23:28 - 00:23:28]: No.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:23:28 - 00:24:06]: So, That's somebody else's podcast, girl. That's not us. So yes, right? The daily vitamin from Finding Balance that incorporates scripture and encouragement. So we also, we want to have grace, right? We will always go back to finding balance and having grace. We wanna have grace for our hearts and souls along this journey. It's not gonna take 1 podcast or 10 podcasts or whatever necessarily to transform. this part of your story. These types of body critical thoughts don't just disappear for most people.
Lasting Freedom and Support
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:24:06 - 00:24:17]: Mm-hmm. Um, and so you may need support like Lasting Freedom, which is a course that Finding Balance offers. Chrissy, you wanna tell us a little more about that?Chrissy Kirkman [00:24:18 - 00:24:53]: Yeah, absolutely. So the Lasting Freedom course is an online curriculum. You can do this by yourself. You can Bring it, have some, you know, bring it to your church and have someone facilitate and do it in a small group setting. But it's a Christ-centered, non-diet approach to working through false beliefs about food and weight. So it's all biblical. And there are several experts who give you God's truth and how it relates to your body image, food issues, and all of those struggles. And it's just, it's a program to help you.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:24:54 - 00:24:57]: Find freedom, and I am living proof that it works.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:24:57 - 00:25:52]: I was just about to say, Chrissy, I know that this program had a huge impact on your journey to freedom. Yeah. So for some people, that program, that, um, material, that course will be an amazing, life-giving, transformative thing. And we hope that is true for many of you. For others of you, you may need more clinical care. And so for some people, you might need a physician, a dietitian, an eating disorder specialist, and Finding Balance also has a Christian treatment finder on our website. So we have local Christian professionals who are trained to work with eating disorders across the United States, um, who have chosen to be a part of our referral network. And that is another amazing opportunity to help access the care that you need.
Eating for Long Life and Scripture-Based Mindfulness
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:25:52 - 00:26:06]: Our message is to eat well and live free. I was in a conversation the other day with my husband's aunt, and she talked about eat for long life. And I thought that was a really beautiful message too.Chrissy Kirkman [00:26:06 - 00:26:06]: Wow.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:26:06 - 00:26:38]: Like, what would it look like if the choices we made promoted our heart, soul, body wellbeing, and that we were eating for long life? So thanks for that one, Aunt Priscilla. Another area I would love to talk about with you as we think about practical tips and turning our mind and mindfulness comes from 2 different scripture passages. And I was doing the Pause app, which is John Eldredge's app where you're opening and closing your day with prayer. And they're highlighting—
Chrissy Kirkman [00:26:39 - 00:26:40]: Love it. It has helped me.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:26:40 - 00:27:11]: It's amazing. They are highlighting resilience and this 30 Days to Resilience program. Well, in that, they highlighted these 2 verses. And this little section. So we're gonna give them credit because this is their intellectual property, but the message is outstanding. So John 14, and this— I'm bouncing around, so it's a great section. We're going to cover parts of 18, 19, 20, and then 27. So just hit John 14, read the whole thing, and you'll be all set.
Do Not Let Your Hearts Be Troubled
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:27:12 - 00:27:37]: It says, do not let your hearts be troubled. Believe in God, believe also in me. And this is Jesus speaking in John. He says, I will not leave you as orphans. I will come to you. Because I live, you also will live. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give as the world gives.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:27:38 - 00:28:12]: Do not let your hearts be troubled. Do not be afraid. And then in Luke 21:34, it says, watch out, do not let your hearts be weighed down by the worries of this life. And what they were mentioning in the Pause app the other day was this beautiful concept that if Jesus says, do not let your hearts be troubled, do not let your hearts be weighed down, Chrissy, it means that we have the power to do not let.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:28:13 - 00:28:13]: Oh yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:28:14 - 00:28:18]: Right? Jesus would not tell us to do something that was impossible to do. He wouldn't.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:28:18 - 00:28:22]: That would be setting us up for failure. He wouldn't do that. He didn't do that.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:28:22 - 00:28:59]: Exactly. He wouldn't. If we did not have the power to master our hearts in terms of being troubled or weighed down, he wouldn't tell us. So this is another way to cultivate our mind and tell our thoughts where to go. Years ago, I was living in Wichita, Kansas, and I was over by one of the YMCAs, and I saw this brilliant bumper sticker that I have quoted in therapy more times than I can count in the last 10 years. And it said, don't believe everything you think.
The Importance of Challenging Negative Thoughts
Chrissy Kirkman [00:28:59 - 00:29:03]: Oh, yes. Yes. So good.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:29:03 - 00:30:01]: Mic drop. Um, so, but we use this in therapy to help combat these negative automatic thoughts, right? The cognitive distortions that we experience when our minds default to negativity. And they do unfortunately default to negativity. So I just love that Jesus is telling us, don't let your hearts be troubled. Don't let your hearts be weighed down by the worries of this life. And as we think about diet culture on steroids, that creates worry in this life, but it won't create worry in the next life. And one of the things I really liked in episode 2 of Old School Food Freedom with Travis Stewart was he talked about when Jesus comes back and it's all said and done, what is the first thing? We are going to have a feast. It's amazing, right? That is amazing.
God’s Desire for Our Fullness and Freedom
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:30:01 - 00:30:37]: We're gonna have a party. And that is like, God wants us to love and enjoy food and nourish our bodies and our souls, not be living in the midst of restrictive, impossible standards. So I also wanted to highlight one of our key verses at Finding Balance is Galatians 5:1. And it reads, it is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by the yoke of slavery.Chrissy Kirkman [00:30:37 - 00:30:37]: Mm-hmm.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:30:38 - 00:31:07]: And in this, if you read back into Galatians 4, Paul is talking about being free from the law. And if we think about where we started today with the Old Testament, right? God says, I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. And we're not coming out of Egypt. I think Egypt is okay these days, probably quite gorgeous. I'd love to see those pyramids one day. But we are coming out of slavery.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:31:08 - 00:31:08]: Bondage.
Fighting Words: Joy, Peace, and Hope
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:31:10 - 00:31:23]: And bondage. And as we think about our theme of joy over jealousy, peace over envy, and hope over hopelessness. These are fighting words.Chrissy Kirkman [00:31:24 - 00:31:24]: Come on!
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:31:24 - 00:32:20]: Right? It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm and do not let yourselves be burdened again by the yoke of slavery. And again, this is never meant to cause shame or judgment. We know, we know that we know That eating and body image struggles can be really deep, hard, heavy, ugly, longstanding battles. And that's why we're here to talk about them. So we are not saying, why aren't you free yet? That is not our attitude. The message is that our God is huge. And his desire is to set right our puppy-like minds, and to help us anchor into his promises, his truth, what he has for us.
Overflowing Joy in God’s Love
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:32:21 - 00:33:03]: So I have a couple more verses. We are talking about John 15:9-11, and Jesus is talking. He says, I have loved you, even as my Father has loved me. Remain in My love. When you obey My commandments, you remain in My love, just as I obey My Father's commandments and remain in His love. I have told you these things so that you may be filled with My joy. Yes, your joy will overflow. There is so much beauty there.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:33:04 - 00:33:24]: And as I think about remain in my love, there is peace and calmness that is the opposite of the frenzy of diet culture, of the new year, new you messaging. We are to like remain in his love.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:33:24 - 00:33:25]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:33:25 - 00:34:16]: We are to soak and absorb, right? There's passages that talk about being grafted into the vine. And he is the vine and we are the branches. And so he talks about if we do these things, if we obey his commandments, and what are his commandments? I am the Lord your God, have no other gods, don't have idols, etc., etc. Don't covet, don't be jealous, don't be envious. Those are his commands. And our joy, yes, our joy will overflow. There is just such beauty and peace and hope in those words of Christ. And then I wanted to also share with you this extended session— section from— going back.
Prayer for Spiritual Strength and Fullness
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:34:16 - 00:35:48]: I also wanted to share with you this extended section from Ephesians 3:14-20. It's called A Prayer for the Ephesians. It's a little bit long. But it's fantastic, and then we're going to unpack it. So it says, for this reason, I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches, he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power together with all the Lord's holy people to grasp how wide and how long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know that this love that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever.Chrissy Kirkman [00:35:49 - 00:35:50]: Amen.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:35:50 - 00:36:15]: Amen. So as we think about that beautiful prayer for the Ephesians, right? And I think about so many of these verses that we've unpacked today, we are being filled. We are being filled in Romans, we're being filled in John, we are being filled in Ephesians, and strengthened out of his glorious riches, he may strengthen you through his Spirit In your inner being.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:36:16 - 00:36:16]: Yeah.
Holding on to Hope Amidst Culture’s Lies
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:36:17 - 00:37:37]: In your inner being. That's the core of us. That's in our bodies. So that Christ may dwell in our hearts through faith, and we are rooted and established in love. And with power, we are then grasping the incredible, unfathomable love of God that surpasses knowledge, so that we may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of Christ. And as I think about God doing immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine, Chrissy, I pray that our words for hope and peace and joy can have an impact in the midst of this hard time in January 2023, where we live in a society that promotes really narrow ideas about how we must look to be worthy. That our God can do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, even with you and I and our humble gift of sharing this journey of being women, living in this culture, struggling with size and shape and food and exercise and what you should and you shouldn't do.Chrissy Kirkman [00:37:38 - 00:37:38]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:37:38 - 00:37:43]: That we have a God that wants to fill us full. Which is the opposite of dieting.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:37:44 - 00:37:44]: Yes.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:37:44 - 00:38:30]: He wants to satisfy our souls, strengthen us in power in our inmost being. So I think about just blessing our listeners with these practical things, these ways to begin to turn the mind, focus on Jesus, armor up with the full armor of God, Access resources, begin the process of do not let your heart be troubled, and know that our hearts are still going to be troubled sometimes, right? We're not trying to set up some crazy impossible standard. My heart gets troubled, your heart gets troubled.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:38:30 - 00:38:31]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:38:31 - 00:38:42]: But, but we have a God that wants our joy to overflow. And us to be filled with hope and faith and joy and peace.
Next Steps and Weekly Focus
Chrissy Kirkman [00:38:43 - 00:39:10]: And I feel hope and, and joy and peace in what you— these, these scriptures that you have just read are full, and how you're saying that, you know, he's filling us to overflowing. And, and that really is the opposite of what the, you know, what culture tells us. So I'd be, oh Lord, thank you, Jesus, for How you show up here. I love this.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:39:11 - 00:39:11]: Absolutely.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:39:11 - 00:39:59]: So we wanna give you 2 more focuses for, for the next week. So for this week, what if you focus on learning, learning, listening to, to podcasts that are, you know, some may be Christ-centered and maybe others are about intuitive eating, but maybe not from a biblical standpoint. Pray about it. Ask God to lead you to podcasts. We have several that we would love to suggest. So you can learn more. Explore our online digital library. We have over 700 articles, videos, different resources, books that we have that we believe in, and you can find on there for different topics.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:39:59 - 00:40:35]: We have a great search engine so you can search different topics. And you can enroll in the Lasting Freedom course. Now, because this is a new year, we want to give our podcast listeners a gift of $39 off our participant bundle. So you get all of our entire course, $39 off. But because it's a bundle, it's already discounted. So it's a really great deal. So this code will be valid through the end of February. We're gonna give you lots of time to save up whatever you need to do.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:40:35 - 00:40:41]: The code is NEWFREEDOM2023. NEWFREEDOM2023.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:40:41 - 00:40:42]: Woo!
Chrissy Kirkman [00:40:42 - 00:41:09]: Yes. So sign up, um, and take this week to learn. Just dive in and learn. And then next week, the week of the 23rd, connect. Focus on connection, connecting. So connect with others who get it or who want to be free themselves. So you're not alone in this. Find somebody who can pray alongside you and support and encourage you.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:41:10 - 00:41:38]: So we have some upcoming prayer groups about to start. Go to findingbalance.com to learn more about that, to sign up. And if maybe you can't make one of the prayer groups that we have available, you can always at any time email us at prayer@findingbalance.com. Send us an email. If you don't know what to say, say, I just need prayer. I'm struggling. Would you please pray for me? We will. We can call you and pray with you.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:41:38 - 00:42:06]: We can pray with you over Zoom, or we can email you a prayer that the Lord has given us. But, but we— and if we can't do any of those, we can always pray for you. Please know you will be prayed for. Absolutely. There's support groups out there. Look at our cedcn.org website, our Christian Treatment Finder, for support groups. Connect with a professional. You can even facilitate your own Lasting Freedom group at your church or home.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:42:06 - 00:42:32]: You don't— and I'm saying facilitate, like you don't have to worry about being the expert or being the leader. You go, you open the place, You facilitate it and you are learning with everyone else. Let the, the videos do the talking and the teaching, and then you just dive in together with the action packs. There's just so many, so many ways that you can connect with others, and God will show up for you right in the middle of that connection.
Closing: A Prayer for Abundant Hope, Joy, and Peace
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:42:32 - 00:43:10]: It's such a blessing. And I think we opened with Romans 15:13, and I want to just close with that. And it says, May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. That is our prayer. Our prayer is that hope and joy and peace are in abundance. Jesus promises He has come that we may have life, And one of the translations says, and have it to the full.Chrissy Kirkman [00:43:10 - 00:43:11]: Yes.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:43:11 - 00:43:12]: To the full.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:43:12 - 00:43:13]: Yep. Right.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:43:13 - 00:43:30]: And the other one says, have it abundantly. But we wanna be full, full of life, full of peace, hope, and joy, and not full of envy and jealousy and comparison and diet culture.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:43:31 - 00:43:35]: This is a new year and we have old school food freedom. Amen.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:43:36 - 00:43:58]: Absolutely. Old school food freedom for the new year. That is our hope and prayer for you all. And we've listed off a lot of great resources. And we just, we just wish hope and freedom and peace and joy. And the Bible promises that we have to trust. That's the only part we have to do. And I know that's hard.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:43:58 - 00:43:59]: Yeah.
Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:43:59 - 00:44:08]: But that God brings The hope, the joy, the peace, the faithfulness, and the salvation. Amen.
Gratitude and Final Words
Chrissy Kirkman [00:44:08 - 00:44:24]: Elisa, thank you so much for all the time you've given to pour into me, pour into our listeners, and to help us know the truth and get closer to God in the midst of our, our struggles with food and body image issues. Thank you.Dr. Alisa Shanks [00:44:24 - 00:44:39]: I love it. My pleasure. It is such a blessing. Always, Chrissy, getting to spend time with you and to prepare these messages for our listeners, and with a prayer that God will just use it and multiply the impact.
Chrissy Kirkman [00:44:44 - 00:45:38]: Thank you for listening to the Old School Food Freedom Podcast. For over 20 years, Finding Balance has been helping people walk in freedom by discovering where Jesus fits into their struggles with food and body image. If you want more biblical truth and encouragement, head on over to FindingBalance.com and subscribe to our free Daily Vitamin devotional. While you're there, explore our Christ-centered Lasting Freedom online course and small group tools. You can help keep this ministry going by donating today at FindingBalance.com. See you next time! The content in this podcast is for informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, or prescribe a particular course of action. If you or someone you care about is battling an eating disorder and is experiencing unmanageable thoughts or feelings, please call 911 if in the US or visit your nearest emergency room.
