What If Food Isn’t The Whole Story?
But over the years, I've begun to wonder if food has often been pointing me toward something much deeper.
I don't know about you, but the tension between self-sufficiency and relying on God feels like a dance whose steps change every season. The more I've reflected on my own story, the more I've realized my struggle wasn’t only about food. I was struggling to trust God with places that felt uncertain, overwhelming, or painful.
The Illusion of Control
Control rarely looks like a struggle — it looks like competence. What appears as discipline to the world — a carefully managed body, a tightly run schedule, a life with no loose ends — can quietly become a substitute for trusting in God. And it only deepens with every bit of praise from people I love. This was my personal experience with control. The affirmation and positive feedback from others fed the idol I had created.
Control often feels safer than surrender. Though I know my God is good, the enemy convinces me that self-reliance is better…
The Joy in the Journey
If God had told me five years ago that I would be leading prayer groups about body image issues, I would have frozen in place. “No thank you, God. That is the last thing I see myself doing or have any desire to do, ever!” I was right in the middle of the hardest part of my recovery journey.
Lessons From the Grey
I was very much a “doer.” Tell me what to do to help my daughter and I will do it, give me a checklist please! There is no checklist for this! I have had to learn more how to “be.” Ugh, I could thrive as a human “doing” yet that is not what my daughter needed.