I am a 36 yr. old female, 5ft. 3 1/2 inches and my weight range is 135-140. I exercise regularly, however, I find myself constantly thinking about food, what/when I will eat, and I often feel guilty when I eat high calorie foods. Do I weigh too much for my height? I enjoy eating – I just fear that I will get fat. I feel that my thoughts about food are not normal. – (anonymous)
Dear anonymous,
Experience has taught me to not debate and/or entertain an argument with any person about their weight-to-height ratio. The truth is weight is a highly volatile, personal, and intricate topic for most persons in our Western culture; that said, I do think it is acceptable and important to examine our overall health status (weight included) in order to live long fully.
What “jumps” out in your question are three items:
1. your thoughts
2. your feelings
3. your fears
What we spend our time and energy contemplating, what we find ourselves feeling, and what we will allow to control our future behavior will define us.
Exercising regularly is a good behavior with mental, physical, and emotional payoffs. On the other hand, creating good food/bad food rules, feeling guilt around enjoying high calorie foods, seeking external affirmation of your physical appearance (weight), and entertaining a fear of becoming “fat” have what payoffs?
Will stringent weight control prove your worth? Will it bring you something valuable in life that less stringent eaters will never know? Will it impact your relationships with significant persons in a positive direction?
The goal of my response is to encourage balance and to challenge you to examine all the aspects of life you want to experience. When you decrease the amount of time you spend thinking about food, the amount of time you spend feeling guilty for eating, and the amount of energy you spend in fear of becoming fat by just 50%– what will you be doing?
When you write down the answers to the above question you would do well to pursue them with a passion.
Inviting Freedom,
Leanne