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Not My Own

Posted on November 26th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 1 Comment  
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The young boy looked critically at the different posters. Superman, Spiderman or Thor? Which was his favorite? He glanced over at his dad, who waited patiently without offering an opinion. “Which one do you like best, Daddy?” the boy asked. “Son, it doesn’t matter to me. Pick which ever one you want; they’re all pretty cool.” “I’ll go with Thor,” the answer finally came, and a satisfied look came over the little boy’s round face. Daddy selected the rolled up…

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Anything But Thankful

Posted on November 17th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 0 Comments  
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It seems like a thousand years ago. It seems like an entirely different me—and I’m so glad. For years, I dreaded the holiday season. Spicy smells, muted hues, constant company, edible traditions all made me nervous—and not the “I can’t wait for Christmas” kind of nervous. It was more like, “How on earth can I escape this madness without gaining an ounce?” One specific year, I recall we went to my aunt and uncle’s house in Missouri. Our family of…

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Three Weapons for Fighting Off Relapse, Part 2

Posted on November 6th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 0 Comments  
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1. Drown it out. I’ve long known that music is like a healing balm for my soul, but I had forgotten just how powerful praise can be. On my way home from the hospital, I stopped to buy a small bluetooth speaker. The moment, I got home, I selected a worship station on Pandora and turned up the volume. Songs of hope, freedom and praise filled the room. God’s presence became almost tangible as I reminded myself over and over,…

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Three Weapons for Fighting off Relapse, Part 1

Posted on October 30th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 0 Comments  
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I’m not so foolish as to think my recovery was iron-clad, but I was pretty convinced I had a good thing going. I’ve been walking in freedom for several years, ministering to others who are struggling with eating disorders. For all practical purposes I have been there, done that and quite literally “wrote the book on it”.  But, Paul warned in 1 Corinthians 10:12, “Therefore let anyone who thinks that he stands take heed lest he fall.” I may have…

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Weather the Storm

Posted on October 23rd, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 1 Comment  
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One of my favorite things in life is a good thunderstorm. A flash of lightning or boom of thunder and I’m glued to the nearest window watching the storm unfold. My dog, Max, on the other hand, finds the safest hiding spot until the horribly loud madness passes. When it comes to storms of life, I am much like Max and prefer to hide away. I don’t like to face my emotions and I don’t like to deal with everyday…

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Posted on October 9th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 0 Comments  
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I landed at  the Nashville airport at 3:35 p.m. Already things had been delayed, but miraculously, we’d landed almost on time. I prayed the shuttle I scheduled hadn’t given up on me. I ran to baggage claim feeling sleepy muscles gripe as I forced them into action. The belt snaked slowly, finally delivering my duffle-bag. I snatched it quickly, careful not to knock anyone over, and drug it to a quiet corner to call my ride. “Hi! I just got…

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Posted on October 2nd, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 0 Comments  
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Recently, I heard Christian author, speaker and founder of the A1 Campaign, Christine Caine share an intimate story of how she prayed for healing. She had been to the doctor and received a bad report about some nodules on her throat. Given that her entire ministry is built around her ability to communicate using her voice, she was terrified. As she confessed her nervousness in the podcast, she told how God led her to pray healing and victory over her…

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I’m Not Fighting

Posted on September 11th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 1 Comment  
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Since merging into a full life of freedom from anorexia, I’ve been honored to turn and shine a lantern over a hopeful path for several dear friends who are in the midst of their own battles with eating disorders. There have been a lot of boulders, bumps and storms lately. Last week, one friend, I’ll call her Janey, emailed me with a heavy heart. To paraphrase her letter, “My therapist told me yesterday that she doesn’t think I’ll ever fully…

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I Still Want A Perfect Body

Posted on September 4th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 0 Comments  
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I’m not ready to give up on the absolute, perfect body. I’m not ready to relegate my hope for unique beauty to a figment of imagination or the realm of special lighting and secret camera angles. If you’ve read my book, don’t worry. I’m not headed off the deep end, tumbling back into the abysmal nightmare called anorexia. Hear me out. Recently, I was praying about beauty, American ideals, excess, poverty and screwed up priorities. I didn’t really expect to…

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The Truth About Social Media–And How It’s Wrecking Us

Posted on August 28th, 2014 by in Chasing Freedom | 0 Comments  
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I burned out this summer. I burned out on vacation because doesn’t it always happen this way? You find yourself sitting on the beach with your brother and sisters and their kids, crying to the sounds of Tom Petty crooning across the water. Because you’ve lost yourself again, in the waves of social media. You’ve forgotten your status is not comprised of hashtags or a few well-worded statements; it’s not in the bestseller’s rank on Amazon or the mentions on…

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