If you’re anything like me you probably wish that every time you came to Jesus you could bring Him awesome gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. I imagine kneeling down before Him, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, the only One who is worthy of all glory and honor and praise, and setting before Him incredibly expensive and fragrant gifts just like the Wise Men did.
Now here’s reality: I have nothing even close to those three items to bring Him. Instead, I come with all kinds of yucky things like fear and discouragement, questions and unmet needs, anger and resentment, body image issues and repeat failures. Basically it’s one unlovely thing after another that I lay at His feet. That’s about all I have to give.
The truth is that something in all of this doesn’t sit well with me. It just doesn’t seem like the kind of offering that someone like Jesus should receive. After all, in the Old Testament when people came before kings they brought amazing gifts. I think I have that image stuck in my head and I fall short.
What this kind of mindset does to me is makes me think I need to doctor up all my crap before giving it to Jesus in order for my gift to be acceptable to Him. But that doesn’t work because He can see through all of it anyway. And the other reality is that it’s exhausting to try and earn His love or approval so any way you look at it, it’s hard to do it all right or get it all right.
I think I’m starting to realize that Jesus wants me to bring Him everything – the good, the bad, and the ugly – and somehow in all of that He is honored because He sees my heart and not just the mess. It really does make me love Him more when I remember that He’s all about making beauty from ashes and seeing past the outside to my heart anyway. He somehow is delighted when I just come, no matter what that looks like, because He simply wants to be with me.
So today Jesus I bring all the stuff I’m carrying and I want you to know that I wish I had better because you deserve better but in all of it I really do need you to redeem it and use it for your glory. I don’t know how You do it….but that’s why You’re God and I’m not.
I have a big smile on my face now. Seeing it this way takes the pressure off and really does remind me that You are all about our relationship rather than expectations or performance. With that in mind, I’m feeling lighter and happier already.
Jesus….You make life so much easier when I filter things through Your truth!